Getting Used to a Family Routine

Before we had kids, my husband and I were pretty predictable.  Okay, we still are, but stick with me.  Weekdays were like clockwork: wake up, get ready, make lunches, work, come home, sweatpants, food, tv, bed.  Yup, lather, rinse, repeat.  Hard to believe the girl who used to do keg stands and dance-offs, has morphed into this.  Well, it gets worse, er, better.  With two little ones in the mix now, some things remain the same and some have gotten exponentially more complex.  Weekdays are now: wake up, get ready, get kids ready, finish getting ready, make lunches, round-up kids, drop off kids at daycare, work, pick up kids from daycare, make dinner for kids, find something in the pantry for adults even though we’re too tired to eat, bath time, read books, get out Play-doh, put Play-doh away, get out stickers and markers, put those away, find snacks, get milk, no water, no milk, put princess dress on and sing one line from Frozen’s “Let It Go” fifteen times, put Toy Story on, no Toy Story 2, no mom – the third one!, brush kids’ teeth, get kids in bed, put kids back in bed five times, finally get to watch something that hasn’t been created by Disney/Pixar, go to sleep.

There are things that I’d like to do to help simplify the game, like use my instant pot more, or attempt to prep 31 meals in a day, like Pinterest claims is possible.  I also feel like one of these activities involves smoking crack and I’m too busy to pick-up a new hobby right now.  I’m not at a level yet where I feel I can simplify with purpose and a plan.  It’s more about throwing stuff around and seeing what sticks.  Maybe this chaotic way of navigating parenting (ok, and my age) keeps my once deep desire to drink beer upside down, at bay.

Even with the laundry list of items on the aforementioned task list (shoot, I forgot about the laundry), I know there is more to come.  My daughter isn’t super convinced that the potty is something she needs to be using right now.  I’m totally okay with that.  Every once in a while, she will mention that she wants to sit on the potty.  I play it off like I’m more excited than a cheerleader for the winning team on Superbowl Sunday, but inside I feel like I drew the short stick. Goodbye glass of wine and the couch, I’ll see you later.  I take my place on the world’s smallest stool, sit in front of the toilet where my daughter is now perched, and start to sing Wheels-on-the-Bus and talk about big girl panties for the next ten minutes.  If I think she’s getting a little too comfortable and has forgotten the mission, I’ll showcase the toilet paper roll like Vanna White, in hopes that we can just chalk this one up to an A for effort.  Get to flushin’.  What’s so wrong with diapers anyway?

And teeth brushing.  If the amount of time it takes to get her to brush her teeth, was actually utilized to brush her teeth, she’d have the world’s cleanest mouth.  Instead we’re splashing around in faucet water, practicing how to spit and brushing the counter top.  On the bright side, if the toothpaste holds up, I may not ever have to worry about re-caulking around the sink.  I miss those days when she just had gums.

For right now, the time-consuming teaching of the routine IS our routine.  I think everyone will eventually get the hang of it all, which is why I’m not trying to put too much pressure on me, or any one thing.  Making simple modifications can help too.  Like bringing the wine into the bathroom when it’s time to sit on the tiny stool.  Sixteen years down the line, when we’re helping our daughter pack for college, I don’t think she’ll be asking which box I put the diapers in.  I also don’t think she’ll be forgetting the toothpaste.  At least not on purpose.